Archive for April 2012

My First Zombie Encounter

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Last night, I had a really rad nightmare... or was it? Ang saya kasi eh. Hihi

We were watching kasi this football game in the Yankee Stadium (football in a baseball stadium? Labo.) I don't exactly remember how I got down to the basement. I think I was with a group of people, however I can't remember how big our group is and who consists of it. Underneath the Yankee Stadium was an abandoned hospital.

We went exploring and we found a way out  of the hospital. We then started hitchhiking this deserted expressway. Once we're at the toll plaza (or so that was what I think it was), we started seeing strange people with strange movements. I knew in an instant that they were the undead.

We entered their town. They weren't stupid at all! There were zombie drivers, zombie nurses, zombie passersby, zombie et cetera. Though they're smart, I know that they were still craving for living human flesh kasi they were starting to close in on us. Basta there were lots of running. Two big buses arrived while we're trying to run away from the zombies. These buses contained real living humans-- those just like us. The buses offered daw a mobile shelter for the living, promising its passengers to get them to some place safe. And hirap na kasing bumalik eh. There were lots of zombies dun sa toll plaza kanina.

Right! I remember being with Maggie and Guilli then. We were seated at the second story of the bus (open, walang roof). Somehow I sensed na the bus was releasing this hallucinogenic gas. Guilli started seeing things-- he started mumbling about a blackboard tapos he was writing on it daw with a chalk. He was going insane. Before it totally got to Maggie, I grabbed her tapos we jumped off the bus a lá ninja. Really, we did!

Maggie and I ran to the roadside, tapos off the bridge (where the buses were sitting on). It wasn't that high naman eh. There we found a small church, one so small, we couldn't fit through the doorway. Maybe it was just a huge dollhouse or something. So we stayed right next to it, hoping na the vines would shelter us. I was trying to construct my death note na ata by then since I was "losing hope" eh. Ewan. I just thought na that we were supposed to lose hope na since we know that there's no getting back up with all those zombies mingling at the toll plaza.

Then came a group of living humans-- most of which were familiar to me! Andun si Gab Soriano and some other high school buddy though I can't remember na since it already faded with the rest of some of the details of my dream. I also remember being with Innah Tordilla, and Penny from The Big Bang Theory.

They were with a man who looked like Arnold Schwarzenegger who ordered us to come with him kasi daw he might know a place where we can hide. We ran and ran and ran and entered a building and ran and ran. Of course, we were running because we were being chased by zombies. For the record, even though the zombies were civilized, they were such slow runners. Tapos, while the zombies were at it, our group penetrated this small room, then we locked the doors. Of course, being such a pussy, I went dun sa wall opposite the door para sure.

I went through my backpack to get my phone. I was hoping na may free wifi-- but who was I kidding? I immediately turned my wifi sensor off since the zombies might track us down. Who knows, right? They were smart zombies. By then I was thinking about telling Mama what happened through text, explaining to her na I went to the kanayunan since she would only take it as bullcrap if I tell her na I'm with a group which was stuck in the zombie world. Bullcrap, riiiight. Anyway I decided not to send it kasi baka our group still has a chance to go back to the human world.

We were there waiting for nothing for a loooong time. There's no reason to believe na rescue will actually come. I doubt that somebody even knows we're down there. Yes, people above might acknowledge our absence, pero there's no way they're going down there to look for us.

Then comes a stray zombie encounter. Innah Tordilla was supposed to be watching the door, but somehow, the door was left open (if I remember correctly, we shut it close kanina), tapos nagpapahangin ata si Innah. No one was doing something about it, so I ran to door, pulled in the zombie, and closed it shut. Why did I pull the zombie in, you ask. Well, if he were to be shut out by living humans, he would most likely scratch and scratch and scratch at the door to try to get in (for a meal), tapos he might catch the attention of other zombies passing by. Anyway its body looked kinda brittle, so I snapped it into half. Aba aba, wala ata siyang zombie superstrength unlike dun sa mga napapanood ko sa Resident Evil. Good.

So we waited. Again, for nothing. Siguro that Arnold Schwarzenegger dude was just waiting for the right time to strike or something. Penny started singing just because she was bored.

Then I heard roars outside the room. It had stained glass windows naman with a circular hole about half an inch in diameter, so I took a peek outside. Apparently, there was a zombie gathering taking place just outside our room. The zombies were playing music and Penny was singing to it. The volume of her voice was going up-- she seemed to be enjoying herself, so I had to tell her to keep quite and shit.

A cute zombie (kamukha ng dating kong crush in high school) with a cigarette in his mouth might have probably realized that something's up with the room we were in. Curious, he opened the (unfortunely unlocked) door, so I pushed it close immediately. Seconds later, there were lots of clawing at the door. I was holding the door back while the rest of my crew looked at me, not knowing what to do, too. Someone helped me hold the door, so I decided to take a peek out of the hole ulit to see how bad the situation was.

I saw a woman dressed smart casually looking at me. "Jean?" she asked. Sabi ko, yes, I am Jean. I do not know who she is, though. She asked me to open the door and run for it, while she took care of the other zombies. She herself was a zombie, but I decided to trust her.

I opened the door, the rest of our group went for it, but I had to go back for my backpack. For some reason, I could not find it anymore. I looked at the door, realized na kakalabas lang ng last person, and decided na I should start running for my life since ako nalang tao sa loob. The smart-casually-dressed woman led the way out. We were running and shit, but this time however, the zombies seemed to be scared of getting in contact with us.

The only thing I could think of was my backpack. I was worrying about my phone kasi Jillian had recently lost hers, I don't want to be an addition to another irrelevant expenditure. Then it occurred to me na nakipagpalit pala ako kay ***** ng phone. How the hell was I supposed to replace his? I'm experiencing this summer pennilessness. Moving on.

Were back to the human world. Tapos nagising na ko.

I can't consider this dream to be a nightmare since I didn't feel uncomfortable having it, unlike the one where I was supposed to manually climb up a super mega duper steep cliff since Sadako was after me. This one was pretty  fun naman.

Cheers to the post-armaggedon zombies. May they be as smart and civilized as the ones in my dream.

Procrastination defenestration

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Since I won't be able to do my thing in Pampanga due to the fact that I cannot attend summer classes since the ones I need to take up slash catch up to are not offered this summer, I'll at least try my best to avoid being eaten alive by idleness. Yeah, screw budget cuts.

Friends, Gallifreyan Time Lords, fellow Jedi Knights, and young Padawans, I present to you a list of activities that I expect will help me fight off summer boredom, with or without a light saber. May the Force be with me.

Kalandian: Ang Tagal Naman

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So, what's with this piece, eh? 

I'm kind of exclusively dating this guy every summer for three years now. There never were an "us", but hey, I don't know, maybe I prefer it that way. I just don't know about him. Efforts for there to be an official something between us were exerted by him, pero I won't let it happen. Maybe I'm scared of commitment or something. Basta. I just prefer it this way. Open relationship-ish.

Back to the piece now, eh? Let's not stray off and let's avoid further kalandian na din. Okay, so medyo may kalandian. Actually malandi nga. So here goes.

Girls, don't you just hate it when the guy you like replies really mabagal-ly? Well I friggin' do. Kaso ayoko aminin, tunog desperado eh. Haha.

Ayoko na. Pure kalandian lang talaga eh. Kbye.

Easter drumbeats

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Don't question my faith, I'm not even sure if I still have one.

Happy Easter, folks. The Savior is alive. Again. Happened last year, didn't it? And the year before that. And the year before those. Oh, you get the idea. Don't take this as a ridicule of religious festivities-- I'm merely pointing out the gist of whatever we're doing for the past centuries. I mean, are we not getting tired? Every year, we grieve the death of an Icon who we know for sure will rise again in exactly three days. Parang joke time lang kasi eh. I really don't get it. Experts, enlighten me.

Let's move on. I am not here to spark a solid-Christians-kami uprising against me anyway.

Yan. Putting aside le state of confusion I am in as to whether there really is a superior being or not, I decided to join the annual Salubong. Why, you ask. Have you not just told us that you're confused about your faith, you ask. Well, I've got other reasons to join the Salubong. First, I get to reunite with old friends (in guise of my real mission: to scan the surroundings for boyfriend-material-slash-pwede-na guys). Second, I get to experience the Easter drumbeats.

Easter drumbeats. What are they master, you ask. Dear Padawan (yeah baby I'm a friggin' Jedi Master now), this set of beats is the most bizarre part of the Salubong. I don't know eh, but ever since I'm little, whenever I hear these drumbeats past four in the morning, I get attracted to it. As moths are attracted to light. Joke. Ditch the simile, I'm not amused either. Move along.

Again, when I was still little, whenever I hear these drumbeats, I'd get out of the bed tapos direcho sa window. Shit, man. Alam mo yung feeling na you're transported to another world? Or something. Basta! Teka kuha lang akong thesaurus para ma-describe yung nafi-feel ko tuwing naririnig ko yung drumbeats na yon. Amusing, chancy, chimerical, comical, erratic, fantastic, funny, odd, peculiar, quaint, queer, quizzical, unusual, wayward, weird, whimsical. And let us not forget: magical.

I don't know about your parish, pero ours have these drumbeats matagal na. Consistent, pards. Basta. Napaka-surreal. Unexplainable eh. If this was the church's way of attracting mass goers, then holy mother of cows, it's friggin' effective!

Have you guys ever experienced the Easter drumbeats?

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