Archive for July 2012

Princess Monster Wife

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So my 50th post is about my second favorite TV show (after Doctor Who, of course), Adventure Time! Yeah. Cheers.

Ever since class started I was not able to keep up with the latest AT episodes since I was too busy watching films from the nineteenth and twentieth centuries so that I can finally tick off some of those listed in my movie bucket list (which I'll have probably scanned in the future so I can show it off to you because yes darling I am indeed the infamous Captain Showoff). Season 4 has just started pero they have already released lots of episodes but I was only able to download those of and prior to the 18th of July keeping me from delighting myself with the three newest ones.

Yes, I am a little disappointed with myself. I seem to have partially lost my piracy skills. I just hope I don't totally lose the right to utter a mighty "Arrrr".

Anyway earlier today I decided to watch two episodes of Adventure Time before starting to study (which still sits unticked on my to-do list oh my glob). I saw Hug Wolf and Princess Monster Wife.

Princess Monster Wife's appearance made Finn and Jake faint-- no kidding.

I just wanted to say that Princess Monster Wife, by far, is the most disturbing episode of AT!

In this episode, Ice King actually had a wife-- who actually was in love with him! Ice King still made use of incantations though-- he created, patched together rather, a wife out of stolen body parts! Read that right. Stolen body parts-- that's what made this episode so fuckin disturbin.

Ingredients of Princess Monster Wife
  • Right half of Princess Bubblegum's face
  • Left half of Turtle Princess' head
  • Lumpy Space Princess' chin
  • Wildberry Princess' right arm
  • Muscle Princess' left arm
  • Back half of Hot Dog Princess (as a right leg)
  • Skeleton Princess' left leg
  • Dr. Princess' midsection (heart and intestines)
  • Elbow Princess' hips
  • Slime Princess' bottoms
Thing is, Ice King and Princess Monster Wife really loved each other. Their story ended a tragedy though-- Princess Monster Wife felt bad about being made out of stolen body parts so she decided to give the stolen parts back to their real princess owners leaving her with nothing but her voice (which by the way was the combined voices of Princess Bubblegum and LSP and Turtle Princess, giving the audience and eerie, nightmare-ish feeling). Via the wind, she told Ice King that even though her parts are separated she will always be with him.

Ice King didn't mind, really. He just complained that his now-dead wife was giving his stuff away (which did not really belong to him in the first place) making me want to take back what I said about Ice King finding true love.

Here's Princess Monster Wife, by the way.


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Ikaw ang aking mahal saking sinta.
--Aking Kasintahan

Pati ba naman sa Filipino, wrong grammar pa din? Ayos.

The Skywalkers

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Say hi to Luke and Leia!
Oo na. Hanep na sa Star Wars reference. Pagbigyan. Fan eh.

Also, 'di pa rin sila umaalis sa carton.
Woo hoo we've adopted introverts.

Animé hair

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People tell me I've hair resembling those of anime characters.

How my hair
looks like:

How I think my
hair looks like:

How I think people
think my hair
looks like:

Because yeah baby animé hair is equal to super saiyan hair. So don't mess with me if you don't want me to kame hame you because I think people think I can.

Moriarty: To die is an art

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Last night, I was already starting to get worried since our pet hamster Moriarty who usually runs around our bedroom (we don't put him in a cage since he's one to easily get bored) wasn't running around our bedroom anymore.

This morning, Jared finally decided to look for Moriarty. He found him under the closet, lifeless. We don't know for sure what caused his death, pero we think na maybe while he was making his way behind the closet, somebody accidentally pushed the closet towards the wall, killing the poor guy. He was in a labas-ngipin and tila-nakalambitin position when we extracted him.

We all were devastated-- Jared, Jill, and I. We had really strong emotional attachments to this little fella'.

To die is an art

Good night Moriarty. Hope you enjoy hamster heaven.



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My Econ 102 class kicks off at eight hundred but I woke up at eight hundred so I was kinda glad that I took a bath last night (kasi I don't want to play the who-goes-first game with my housemates) but then I was not very happy with the fact that I was already late so I crammed every piece of school-related shit into my sling bag and ran outside with a really huge chunk of banana in my mouth hoping that it will resolve the oh shit 'di pala 'ko nakapag-toothbrush hanky-panky I was in.

Disgusting, I know. Pero admit it, you've also already experienced going to school without brushing your teeth so don't lie to me baby don't lie to me.

I then rode a jeepney so that I'd land on the smoky planet of Main Gate in a matter of seconds but then my kick-ass playlist monopolized my conscious ness so ayun I got off at SM Clark (which probably made Manong wonder why I'm there eh SM's still on hibernate at 8:15) so I had to walk some fucking twenty-something meters. Fuck.

The thought of not attending Duran's class almost overrun my mind but then good thing the sloppy tiny nerd things that my ears emit fought it off. I stuck my eyeball between Room 7's door and door frame to see if my classmates were already high with Econ mental drugs only to find out that there was not a single spirit in the room. Nag-meeting pala, pati si Sir De Leon kasama. Therefore classes were cancelled. We also weren't going to meet Sir Patawaran that afternoon so I skipped merrily to the hintayan ng jeepney and went back to the apartment.

A toast of banana
While packing up I realized that I still had four bananas left so I decided to bring them babies upstairs and hand them to Ivy and Clarence and Kaye and me then we peeled it halfway and made a toast as if them bananas were glasses of scotch. We probably looked like a bunch of happy monkeys.

I went home (as in Cainta home) and submitted to my eagerness to kinda pluck my guitar to Wish You Were Here because oh lawd I think I'm addicted to Pink Floyd's song. I kinda succeeded in learning how to play it, by the way.

Then it occured to me that I still had to pay for that Team Manila shirt so I decided to go to SM to finally pay for it and maybe drop by Sofia's crib afterwards (since she invited me to study with her) so I did.

Insert high levels of procrastination here.

Things we did besides deciding to not study:
  • Talk about bands she's into
  • Rant about how expensive moleskin journals are
  • Start constructing her bucket list
  • Take graphology tests
  • Define the elitist lifestyle
  • Devour 4 packs of instant noodles (welcome to our humble system, kidney stones)
  • Read awesome people's blogs
Sofia's new denim thingamabob

I swear one day this girl'd turned into the ultimate band geek.

What's with the unanticipated showcase of  art pieces? Special effects, bro.

Indie-indiehan ambush

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Oh I have seen a couple of indie films-- foreign nga lang. Kung hindi naman yung mga nakakaabot ng maintream, the only local ones I got to see were those with medyo magarang mga sex scenes. Ewan ko ba kung bakit ganon yung mga nakukuha ng mga nakokopyahan ko.

Siguro crush lang talaga nila si Coco Martin.

Ayan. Lumalayo na tayo. Last Monday, I was a tiny probinsiyana lost in the rather moderately big city of Makati. Jill was supposed to accompany me, but I guess she was too busy minding her own business of not minding mine.

From Gateway, I tailed this lady kasi I thought she was going to watch some Cinemalaya too kasi siya manamit. Feeling ko kasi ganun yung mga elitista sa UP eh. Yes I am one hell of a stereotyping shitty being now. Ayala yung ticket na binili niya sa MRT eh. Kaso nga lang I lost her pagbaba ko ng Ayala.

I was left on my own. Feel na feel ko pa naman pagiging spy ko. Ewan. Masyado ata akong naapektuhan ng panonood ko ng Mission Impossible.

I then had no choice but to swallow my spy pride and ask for directions. Long story short, I was able to get my ass in Greenbelt 3. Thanks to my spies-only GPS thingie pre-installed on my Android (k feeler). Tapos I got myself two Cinemalaya tickets.

A three-hundred-peso casualty. Woo hoo.

I decided that I really need to learn how to get to CCP para maka-avail ako ng 50% discount demmit

I then got myself a tumbler of popcorn and a bottle of water then ta-da I went inside the cinema na. I was trying to strain my cough the whole time pero tongue-in-a ang hirap. I just had to bark. Na-conscious tuloy ako sa mga katabi ko.

The first movie I saw was The Animals. I didn't find it super interesting-- or maybe I was just, er, analysing it in a super shallow manner kaya 'di ko masyado nahimay yung gustong iparating niya? That or literal lang talaga lahat. Here's what kinda got my attention-- in *dundundun* bullets.
  • Those manong tsupers sharing to each other crazy (and really shitty embarassing) tales about their bosses
  • Somehow, John Wane Sace was able to find his way to the fountain of youth. Tae ang bata pa rin niya tignan
  • Anorexic kids exist pala here in the Philippines. Akala ko such species only inhabit the lands of America and Europe
  • Yung pagkalasing nung character na Cara... ganun din ba 'ko malasing? Woo hoo insecurities
  • Instant MOMOL, instant blow job, instant sex!
Then it was allll over. On my way out I was even able to see Ramon Bautista and he was with this girl who was unfamiliar to me so I'd assume she's not some sort of a celebrity or maybe she is but I was just too ignorant to remember or something. I smiled at him and he nodded at me. Siya na sikat at nginingiti-ngitian nalang ng mga chics. That's right folks. Chics ako. Muhahahahahahaha

I had nothing to do then but turn into the freeloader that I am ulit so I sucked up to Greenbelt's free wi-fi and logged in to Facebook and Twitter. My inner social climber uploaded the photo of my butas-bulsang movie tickets. Sorry. I just had to brag about the fact that I was going to watch some indie shit on my own in a place I'm super unfamiliar with. Moving on.

That time, I was sitting in front of Red Mango's store and was thinking about trying out their famous waffles with yoghurt, kaso I thought na I shouldn't inflict any more injury to my already-nagdurugong wallet.

A lovely plate of waffles might have been calling out to me, 'di ko lang narinig.

Also, I almost bought a Cinemalaya shirt. Ewan. There's this little man in me na nagsasabing dapat kada event na puntahan ko may souvenir. I'm almost broke, so baby that can wait. Sana.

Tapos with just five minutes left to spare (before my second serving of Cinemalaya) I bought a bag of Snacku. Now how did I end up buying something so cheap? Eh mahal kasi lahat eh. Greenbelt is a pang-laking aircon establishment and I've got no right to be there unless I'm with my mum.

So I went inside theater na ulit.

This time, I was able to control my coughing so yeah less coughing kaso I had trouble trying to open my bag of Snacku because I don't want to tell the people na oh my golly I'm opening a freakin bag of junk listen to me do it so I tried my best to synchronize my "tear here"-ing activity with those instances na maingay yung trailers.

Woo hoo piracy

Tapos biglang nagtext si Char na she was in the same cinema I was in that time so I tried looking for her and I found her so I went to sit next to her and her dormmate Fe and hoped na nobody paid for the seat I was sitting on and fortunately nobody really did.

We saw a series of Cinemalaya short film entries, and here's what I thought.

  • Bulong's one hell of a comedy. I love it. Kaso I feel bad dun sa matanda because everybody's just waiting for her to die so that they can whisper to her their aspirations. I saw how the level of income is positively correlated with the quality of wishes an individual has.
  • Manenaya moved me to tears. It was such an excellent film so I wouldn't want to spoil it-- should my blog have readers. Or not.
  • The drunk man's line "Yung mga bagay bang nawala sa buhay mo, pwede mo rin bang mapanalunan 'yon?" stuck to me. Ewan.

Baka yung iba kailangan ng super critical thinking para maintindihan talaga. Kasi ang nagustuhan ko lang yung first two eh.

After our walgasan activity, we went ot Pizza Hut to walgas some more! We ordered a 9-inch pizza na ay Diyos ko super liit lang pala kaya buti nalang that tiny piece of pa-expensive dough was accompanied by pasta. I then realized the importance of pesto and how it could make one's life so fucking nice.

I'm starting to miss Mama's easy-cook pesto.

Also, I had a blast.

Time for a dash of vanity woo hoo


Tongue. Because Tongue-in-a, we weren't able to watch Bwakaw.

Baby pizza

Ain't even a decent shot... thanks sir waiter.

Evil scheme

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You: I love you.
Me: Bakit
You: Ewan

Tssss. Pero deep inside you just want to take advantage of my genius so that you can finally take over the world.


Like a sir

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People (Sofia lang, actually pero anyway), I present to you:


in a tux!
Woo hoo

Well she didn't tell me not to post here. I've got no readers anyway aside from Sofifi sa what the hell, right?

Also, she introduced me to her new turntable. She lives in a condo. She needs something to brag about. HAHAHAHA.

I love you, brother.

We thought of turning to the nudist movement

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Yesterday I was in a cab on my way home when Monica (my best friend yihee) SMS-ed me some weird shit. She wanted to see me. However, we weren't able to meet up that day.

So today we went on a date.

I told my mum (yihee feeling British) na I would be home by 12 noon. I guess I was obligated to since it's a Sunday. We have pizza on Sundays-- Jillian and Jared and Mama and I.

So anyway I went off and I was kind of starting to worry because it's already x minutes past 10 when I got to Puregold and maybe Monica and I (and maybe her sisters too) might not be able to finish even just one of the movies I downloaded (especially for them) since they will still have to attend the Lighthouse by 1pm (and anyway they never did). I got even more worried when I realized that all cashier queus were so very fucking long. I held my patience for one fucking liter of chocolate fucking ice cream.

But it was worth it.

Or not. Pagdating ko kasi sa bahay nila I went directly upstairs (as fast as I can kasi I was afraid na some creepy woman in black would show herself to me) only to find Mocs asleep. She was a mess. Helen and Daniella and I kept telling her to wake up, but to no avail. She just keeps giving us a moan of "yes okay I heard you I'll get up". 'Di niya talaga ko pinapansin.

Pero some time after that nagising din. Buti nalang. Kaya pala she wasn't responding to my text messages. What a potato.

We then saw Wanderlust. It was a weird movie. I didn't quite understand how Jennifer Aniston and whoever her leading man was ended up rich and how that nudist dude's novel became a best seller. I don't even know what we're watching. I guess it was a movie about hippies and the moral of the story is that being a hippie turns frowns upside down. Yihee rhyming.


Daniella and Monica and I had lunch sa living room. Monica then started telling me the story behind all those weird text messages I was receiving from her the day before but of course I can't spill it here.

Whatever it is she's going through, I hope everything turns out okay. That's right folks: she's thinking about ending their dog's life. It's a shame. That dog and I-- though I never really knew his/her/its name-- that dog and I grew really close. It was the one who kept me company when Monica was too busy with either doing chores or bossing her sisters around. I'm going to miss that dog.

So obviously that story about the dog was made-up.

When it was time for me to go, Monica decided to go with me probably because she thought she was going back na to her Avída Tower(s) quarters (because yes that's where's she's staying during weekdays now) pero actually she forgot na tomorrow pa talaga siya pupunta dun.

We had our date sa Soya Bar (bagong bukas ata yun since I don't believe I've seen it before) and talked about the past week's chronicles. I had a serving of soy pudding and some grilled chicken sandwich. She had soy bubble milk tea (which was kind of weird to consume since 'di bagay ang sago sa soya) and an order of chicken something quesadillas (which I thought had too much mayo). Her treat! (Woo hoo lagi niya nalang akong nililibre ang galing ko talagang mamili ng best friend joke.)

(I placed lots of details sa previous paragraph kasi I want it to sound like some food critic review thingy kaso I wasn't able to actually give my review because giving reviews is one of the many things I suck at.)

I think we (mutually) agreed to do this (the date thingy with the I'll-tell-you-my-week's-highlights thingy) more frequently! Hihi.

Also, we talked about Hannah whose flat we'll be visiting on Saturday. So Hannah, go shopping na for food. We'll need those.

Baldie's strategy

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Five months ago, the plot of Lordei Hina's almost date with death-- in huge bold black font and all-- took up quite some space on the news stands. You have probably heard of her. This certain nationalist student leader (oha, tunog blind item) was, well, hit with an ice pick just above the left temple, fracturing her skull and knockin her unconscious.
So how did the progressive community take this? Well, they kind of misinterpret the situation and blamed the government for not providing enough subsidy for the national university to enhance security measures. They fell right into the government's trap.

You must be thinking, bitch, ya so cuh-razy.

What if I told you, that the government planned this to have a reason to increase militarization sa loob ng campus? To compensate for the lack of security measures daw while the subsidy is bansot.  Suma-strategy si P-Noy, yihee. Eh bullshit bawal nga ang high military presence sa school eh. It puts pressure on the students. 'Di pa ba effective yung mga hina-hire nilang student intel para maniktik sa red people? What the fuck, Jean. Malamang hindi. K. Sorry darleng.

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