Because one vampire movie marathon won't do
5/5 | A 12-year-old loner befriends a 12-year-old nonhuman
recluse in this morbid little love tale. I loved the original Swedish version
and i have already braced myself for ruthless vandalism, but it turns out that
my nega expectations were a letdown because i find this to be the better
version. It has given me answers to questions i have had after seeing the original
one askdjfs but but but the original one’s more eerie so i say everybody should
see both shit
1/5 | This is the third version i’ve seen, and so far i must
say that this is the one i didn’t like the most. All of the characters looked alike
and most of them were trying too hard not to block the audience’ view. I think
the only shit people should see is the part where Van Helsing slapped the shit
out of the Harkers’ housemaid (huhu dat shit made me laugh so hard because it
looked so strange hahaha)
4/5 | They say you are what you eat, and it seems that Jeepers Creepers is taking that adage
very literally. The clothes-sniffing, corpse-MOMOLing (read it right),
fear-smelling winged creature of a renowned urban legend turns into what it
consumes... or so that’s what the crazy psychic woman says. Speaking of crazy,
the thing that drove me sorta really bonkers here was that abandoned church
basement cave hideout bedazzled with stitched-up freaky-faced cadavers! I
THOUGHT THAT THAT’D BE FUCKING TRAUMATIZING (if you don’t then go away)
2/5 | Now i don’t know what Seth Grahame-Smith was smoking at
the time he wrote this, but whatever it was, HE MUST HAND IT OUT TO ALL THE
OTHER WRITERS OUT THERE! Sure, the plot was not that terrific, but i loved how
he mashed up history with fictionnnn. I didn’t like the story that much because the
it was very predictable. However, i appreciated how they imparted scientific knowledge on why bloodsuckers
are killed by silver oo masaya na ko non sorry. Also, THE SETTING! The setting
was so very fucking amazing and i’m pretty sure that i’d love to live in this
era! I won’t mind the lack of hygiene, i swear!
4/5 | This unauthorized silent film adaptation of Bram
Stoker’s novel comes in black and white AND YET IT COMPLETELY SPOKE TO ME
LADFJD. I think it’s because of the cute actions, the pretty faces, and the
refreshing background scores? idk why, but it somehow reminded me of those fantasy RPGs
i used to play back when our PS2 hasn’t gone nuts akjflasdk who wouldn’t love a
rush of nostalgia? Also, i think i may have a little crush on Nosferatu. I
guess i’m attracted to guys with dark circles round their eyes and freakishly
long fingers ? ? ? Plus he looks like some dude you’d push down the school
stairs (not that i push people down the stairs though) and i sort of really
like geeky bully magnets (okay i said it huhu) (also, not that Nosferatu
actually is a bully magnet... he just looks like one)